Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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