i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Randomize
