i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
