im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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