just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
