I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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