your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
