I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
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I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
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he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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