you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
