What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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