I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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