I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
it's like iHOP with fire
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
