i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
