im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
