I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
