He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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