I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Swine flu is the new snow day.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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