I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
