So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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