Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
