What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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