Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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