Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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