He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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