Your face is a jimmy john
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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