just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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