She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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