This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
