Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Just fell off a train. Bad.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
