You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
