there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize