We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
