I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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