Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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