It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
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It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
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You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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