just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
