I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I forgot wine drunk hurts
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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