Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
