I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize