Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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