Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
