I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I'm way too hungover for life right now
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
