i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
He told me they were just razor bumps!
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
