turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
