So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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