Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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