Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  we're blogging at a bar

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  (248): we're blogging at a bar http://tfl.nu/eoo1
  Replies (3) Good night (1303) Bad night (3159)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Will you blow on my dice?

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  (248): Will you blow on my dice? http://tfl.nu/qi0r
  Replies (3) Good night (1335) Bad night (661)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.

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  (813): Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase. http://tfl.nu/k8pp
  Replies (20) Good night (4668) Bad night (844)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.

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  (503): Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy. http://tfl.nu/7ct1
  Replies (11) Good night (718) Bad night (3199)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders

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  (248): so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders http://tfl.nu/1b2g
  Replies (21) Good night (4502) Bad night (1213)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell

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  (506): Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell http://tfl.nu/5oyd
  Replies (19) Good night (4080) Bad night (1307)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.

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  (303): It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic. http://tfl.nu/yvsq
  Replies (28) Good night (2472) Bad night (4833)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked

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  (774): just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked http://tfl.nu/dcyr
  Replies (7) Good night (2999) Bad night (803)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.

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  (423): She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21. http://tfl.nu/keb8
  Replies (6) Good night (4423) Bad night (875)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.

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  (541): i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts. http://tfl.nu/e6qn
  Replies (5) Good night (2259) Bad night (677)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this

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  (913): Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this http://tfl.nu/urxm
  Replies (11) Good night (915) Bad night (1524)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me

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  (850): Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me http://tfl.nu/sziw
  Replies (5) Good night (1813) Bad night (753)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?

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  (218): Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time? http://tfl.nu/ojrn
  Replies (0) Good night (546) Bad night (341)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.

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  (405): Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky. http://tfl.nu/1s85
  Replies (4) Good night (1165) Bad night (383)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Umm

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Exactly.

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  (240): Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor... (301): Umm (240): Exactly. http://tfl.nu/dkql
  Replies (1) Good night (374) Bad night (563)

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