I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize