How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize