that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
